Mapaseka “Pasi” Koetle Opens Up About Heartbreak, Forgiveness, and Her Father’s Absence

Mapaseka “Pasi” Koetle, best known for her powerful role as Dintle Nyathi on Scandal!, recently opened up about some of the most painful and personal moments of her life. Speaking on the Engineer Your Life podcast, in an episode titled “I Chose Forgiveness and Letting Go”, the 36-year-old actress shared how her parents’ separation and her own divorce have shaped her emotional journey.

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Pasi spoke candidly about her father leaving the family, which deeply affected her growing up. “I forgave my dad. My dad left my mom and left us. I don’t have a problem with divorce, but don’t divorce your kids,” she said, her voice filled with emotion. She explained that her father didn’t just separate from her mother—he disappeared from their lives entirely.

“When I looked at him he made bad choices as a person,” she said. “I don’t know if he left for a woman, but I suspect that maybe he did. When he left, he just left because he wanted to open his own church. That was his reason. He was a born-again Christian. He turned away from the Apostolic church. What broke me is the fact that you can leave your wife, it’s fine, but not your kids.”

Her words were raw and honest, reflecting years of pain that she slowly turned into healing. Pasi admitted that it took her time to realise how deeply her father’s absence had hurt her. “I realised that I’m actually sad, I’m actually angry… it took a while,” she revealed. “I just looked at my life and said I do not want to be this angry anymore. I forgave him and I didn’t even tell him that I forgave him. I didn’t call him and say, ‘Oh listen, I forgive him.’ I just forgave him.”

Pasi also spoke about how her mother handled the situation when her father left. “One day my dad was there, the following day he was not,” she said. “Unlike now, we sit with our kids and say, ‘Oh my baby, mommy and daddy are going their separate ways.’ There was no conversation like that.” She expressed that the silence and confusion around her father’s departure left a deep mark. “It’s not nice. I would do that. I did that with my child when I separated with her dad, but I didn’t see my mom doing it.”

Despite all the pain, Pasi found peace before her father passed away. “When he died, I had already forgiven him. I would talk to him and I loved him. I really did. I wish things were different because the two minutes that I spent with him when he was still with my mom, I enjoyed.”